8 Reasons I Love My Muslim Friends

If you’ve ever thought about stepping into a community seemingly not like your own, let me tell you how I’ve benefited by becoming friends with Muslims.

When I wrote my graduate thesis on Jewish-Muslim commonality, I had to find a mosque and a research pool of subjects for interviews. Those interviews turned into opportunities for relationships and those relationships turned into friendships.

Beyond camaraderie and a whole lot of giggles, beyond Torah study and Qur’an study, and beyond exciting interfaith programming, I’ve gained insights over the past five years that I never could have imagined.

Here’s a list of unanticipated advantages I get by hanging with Muslims. Keep in mind, I live in the ‘burbs of New York. I’m not chilling with Muslims in Afghanistan. (I did, however, meet a fabulous young woman online who lives in Tehran who shattered my perceptions of Iranian Muslims!)

Most of my Muslim friends are women. They are all observant.They are doctors, engineers, civic leaders, business folk, and artists. Most of them are parents. And while my friends are not representative of all Muslims around the world, I would guess they’re pretty representative of mainstream Muslim communities across the United States.

Here’s why I love having Muslim friends.

8. As a Jew, I don’t eat pork or shellfish. For Muslims, pork and shellfish are not hallal (that’s Arabic for not ) That makes it a breeze for me to enjoy a potluck meal with my Muslim friends compared to my would-you-like-that-cheesecake-wrapped-in-bacon friends. (Although, in the interest of accuracy, some Muslims do eat shrimp and prawns.)

7. Since Muslims don’t celebrate Christmas, I have someone to hang with on December 25 besides other Jews and a Chinese waiter.

6. When we go out, I always have a designated driver.

5. I get the straight scoop on Islam without having to rely on third party translators or non-Islamic resources. Sitting with my friends and asking direct questions like, “So you’re in an arranged marriage. What’s that about?” is easy. As easy, say, as asking a Jewish friend for his or her favorite blintz recipe. Probably easier.

4. My friends can provide better make-up tips than any cosmetics counter at Saks or Neiman’s. (Have you seen the gorgeous smoky eyes?)

3. I speak with some authority now when I say Muslims don’t spend their entire day fixated on Israel. My friends are more focused on Muslim relations in the United States and other parts of the world than they are on the problems of Israelis and Palestinians. We share heartfelt compassion for those searching to find peace and reconciliation in the Middle East. But with only 15% of the world’s Muslim population in that part of the world, other matters occupy my friends’ attention more acutely.

2. It’s easier to talk about potentially thorny issues when you’re talking with a friend. Friendship enables us to hear another point of view more easily.

And finally,

1. Did I mention, I always have a designated driver!